warfilmman
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Registered: 02-2005
Posts: 71
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Commando Squad
Commando Squad - 1968
Golly gosh, I’ve done it, I think I’ve actually found the worst war film of all time, and it’s not even an Italian made one. This was made in the good old US of A. The plot has more holes than a hedgehog’s pyjamas, the acting is the worst I’ve EVER seen, and the locations and technical details are ludicrous. A five man team (I suspect they could not afford the wages of any more actors) are sent into the desert to blow up a secret underground explosives factory, that the Allies have only just found out about. The team are wearing ill-fitting Pacific camo, and carry Tommy guns and M2 Carbines (which they use liberally, despite not carrying any magazines for. Lets leave any further details of the story and list of few of the absurdities: German’s wearing camping shorts and chino shirts, with black Nazi helmets, the Germans drive Jeeps. The parachutes are red and white, the German aircraft is a civvy blue and white DC3, and despite being based in a “hidden” German airbase, takes off from a long tarmac runway. This “hidden base” is clearly part of some old mining installation due to be demolished (which the film crew do with consumate ease – I think 90% of the budget went on the explosions). It also includes a 100 foot high chimney, which apparently has never been found by Allied recce aircraft. The funniest bit (and there are many to chose from) is where near the end the heroes stop to blow up a bridge to prevent a half-track from following them. Cut to typical war film scene of man under the span of a bridge setting a charge, zoom out to reveal “bridge” is really just a couple of planks over a tiny ditch – I’m not kidding, this ditch wouldn’t stop a kid on a trike, let alone a half-track. I could talk about the plot holes, and how the death of one of the characters is practically ignored, but I won’t, watch it for yourself. Its so bad its thrilling.
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2/12/2005, 3:03 am
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